5 Ways to Stay Sane During Training Camp

By: Diana Holmes

A drop of sweat trickles down a knit brow to the tip of the nose and slowly drops on the grass between a pair of shoes. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. Huge, deep breaths to regain any sort of breath composure...That's me running after my son in the month of August because I'm out of shape. And you thought I was doing a clever, lyrical depiction of what my husband goes through at training camp, haha.

Training camp is one of the most physically and mentally exhausting parts of football season--for both player and family. So I decided to put a list together of things to do during this next month.

• Work Out! Stay sane and get those endorphins pumping with a nice workout. This one is tough for a lot of the moms out there because of the whole 'no babysitter' thing but even going for a run with the stroller can change your whole mentality. I usually go running when I'm having a bad day and it helps to clear my busy mind. In the famous words of Elle Woods, "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't. " So there's that.
• Build Friendships. Admit it or not, we all morph into homebodies during the season. It seems like plans always get made and canceled because we don't get much time with our guys during season, so we try and capitalize on any we can get. Take training camp as an opportunity to build your friendships or make new ones. Dinner, wine tasting, play-dates--whatever!
• Work Towards A Goal. Set a goal for yourself to achieve. Plan to run a race at the end of the month, join a book club, or declutter your house. The options are really quite endless. You'll keep busy while working towards something that will empower your self-confidence.
• Support, Support, Support!I always get an attitude during camp because it's always frustrating. Andre is exhausted and never has much time to talk. If you're in the same state, you maybe see each other once a week--not to mention all the added stress they experience. It takes a toll on the relationship so this one is the hardest for me. Send care packages, inspirational quotes, Bible verses--anything helps.

Our significant others and their teammates will spend the next four weeks improving their skills and pushing themselves to better their craft. Why shouldn't we do the same?

Growing in God

Usually I can just sit down and start writing. The words just seem to flow but this time was different. I was nervous and anxious but I wasn't sure why. Despite knowing what I wanted to write about, I kept delaying the inevitable. Why wasn't it flowing? Why was I being so hesitant about writing this time? Was it because it was too personal or hitting a little too close to home? Or maybe I wasn't making it a priority. I decided "enough was enough" and I needed to get this out. I believe that if God puts something on your heart, you better listen. No need to miss blessings because of laziness. Throughout my journey in growing in God, I have tried to be a better person, making adjustments here and there just like we all do. Most of those changes didn't cause much of a fuss in my life and seemed easy— but then God challenged me. Why was it okay for me to grow in God but not others?

Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. - Romans 14:13 NIV

We are all guilty of judging others. No matter how many church services we attend or holy communions we take, at some point in our lives we have judged someone else. Whether it be how they dress, how they look, or even how they raise their children. We have all done it. Primarily we judge others based on how their behavior or actions measure up to our moral compass. This is a part of life but I realized that even if the person has changed, often we don't allow the perception of how we think of them to change. We create this barrier in our minds that blocks out their growth. We refuse to believe that our pettiness is no longer warranted or excusable. I was guilty of all of these things. Why was I still holding on to stuff people did in college or even last year? How could I grow in God but not give them the grace that God so eagerly gives to us?

After the nagging feeling just wouldn't go away, I started to evaluate myself. I realized that whatever I was holding on to was holding me back from being greater. So I made a decision that I would allow others to grow in God. Who was I to refuse that? If someone reached out or apologized for their wrongs, I wouldn't secretly wish they didn't so I could be the “better person.” Also, I decided to not let the opinions of others prevent me from developing my own opinion of someone. Just like I grew, others can too.

As women in this crazy NFL life it is easy to just judge others or refuse to associate with someone based on who they used to be. As women we should challenge one another to grow in God not through criticism or judgment but through love. Growing in God is a blessing that is not limited to the few that qualify; it is open to everyone.

Featured WAGS Dionne Boldin: Wife, Mother, Philanthropist #GameChanger!

Sincere, gracious, genuine, intelligent, chic and classy AND that is to say the least. Mrs. Dionne Boldin, wife of Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year, Anquan Boldin, is more than what meets the eye. Dionne is as fabulous as she appears in her killa’ #selfies we see on social media with a timeless air of bold self-confidence. A wife first, mother to two boys second and a philanthropist third, who believes in not only leaving a legacy of giving but creating the mindset to give as well.

Name: Dionne Boldin

Husband/Teams: Anquan Boldin (Cardinals, Ravens, 49ers, Lions)

Children: Ashton (6) & Anquan “AJ” (12)

What #hashtag describes you best: #gamechanger

FUN FACTS

Favorite place to vacation: It’s a tie between Greece & Paris

Best Concert you’ve EVER been to: Beyonce

Interesting Fact about yourself: I’m Jamaican

Hobbies: Traveling & cooking

Your favorite memory: Giving birth to my boys

PERSONAL DETAILS

Where are you originally from and how did you get to where you are now?

DB: I am from Belgrade, FL, which is a little town in West Palm Beach County. We now live in Delray Beach, FL so we are still surrounded by our family. We chose to live near this area specifically early on so we could be closer to our family and create a home base, which was especially important to us as the kids got older.

How did you and your husband meet? What’s your love story?

DB: We met in high school. He is from Pahake (FL), a neighboring small town to the one where I grew up so we have always known each other and we met in probably 5th grade. I was a junior and he was a senior when we started dating in high school. After that, we both went to the same college, Florida State University.

ON THE NFL

What are some of the challenges of being married to an NFL player and what do you like about it?

DB: I like the platform it affords us. The ability to be able to walk into a scenario where you instantly have a platform for whatever your cause may be has always meant a lot to me. As a wife, there is a fine line between staying in a supportive role to your husband and positioning your platform in a way that you are grabbing the right audiences as well. Your presence, your behavior is important because people are always watching to see if you are going to screw up and that makes a difference as far as the type of “positioning” and respect you’ll garner. I have known my husband since he was very young so it has always been great to be able to see him live his dream. What I don’t like about it (and that’s the hard part because we knew what we signed up for)--I do miss having privacy. I miss being able to go anywhere and him not being noticed. I will say that I don’t like the scrutiny that the guys get. The fans can rip them apart for the smallest things and they are seen as“just athletes” when in reality, many of these men are fathers, husbands and genuinely good guys.

WR: What are some of your favorite fondest WAGS memories?

DB: I like the camaraderie. Every team has their own sense of camaraderie and there are always a few wives who will reach out to you when you first arrive. From team to team, I have picked up life-long friends. Whether we are out to dinner with the girls or at a game, those moments (the time spent together) are some of my favorite memories. Of course, Super Bowl year with the Ravens was another fond memory. My time in San Francisco was one of my favorite memories.  In both Baltimore and San Francisco, I led the women's Bible studies.  Being one of the “older girls” in the group, I enjoyed seeing the younger girls grow. I learned so much about each of these girls and really enjoyed pouring into them.

ON FASHION & STYLE

WR: Is fashion a hobby for you or a love? We’ve seen your Instagram looks and are impressed to say the least!

DB: I’ve kinda always loved fashion. Over the years, I have tried to switch it up and make my look different and fun. I went out on a limb last year and brought on a stylist.  We have been working together for over a year so at this point, we are friends now and we’re just having fun! In my free time, we talk fashion and put looks together. At some point in my life, I will be in the fashion industry. Where? I don’t know. For now, I am building my budding  personal shopping concierge service called The Art of Shopping.

WR: What are your favorite pieces and collections that you have been wearing recently?

DB: Everything Gucci is doing is really great right now.

WR: Any all time favorite designers?

DB: Hermes or Chanel, accessories wise. I like what St. Laurent has been doing the last few seasons. My favorite pieces are Jackets and Bombers and I like nice, structured blazers by Balmain.

WR: Don’t we all?...!

ON THE ANQUAN BOLDIN FOUNDATION & WALTER PAYTON NFL MAN OF THE YEAR AWARD

WR: Your foundation work and charitable contributions are nothing short of amazing! Tell us more?

DB: Thank you very much. We started the foundation in 2004 and originally it was just an opportunity to give however that may be. My husband and I both grew up in underprivileged areas and our thought was that we would create opportunities only for those communities. So that is what we have been doing every since we started. In each city where Anquan has played, we have tried to serve in whatever and wherever that city had its specific needs. About two years ago, we created an endowment: It’s a $1 million dollar scholarship in San Francisco and Palm Beach areas for students who academically deserve and have shown a commitment to community service. Our mindset has always been to give and share wherever there is a need but more specifically, we want to CREATE a mindset of givers as opposed to just leaving a legacy where we were the only ones giving.

WR: Has there been one particular charitable experience or individual story that you really valued?

DB: Yes and I definitely see the results. For example, we had one kid who was expelled from his high school. He later went back and got his GED so we gave him a scholarship and now he’s a teacher and started a mentoring program back home (in FL). You can really change lives and shift their perspective and anybody that has been helped, anyone I have poured into- I hope I have created a mindset that this is what YOU need to do as well. We also have a family in San Francisco right now where the mother was homeless with two boys. We put her in an apartment where all of her bills are paid for, for the next year. She’s now saving money, on track to support herself and I speak to her at least every other week making sure she is doing everything she “should” be doing. I like the building of the relationships as well. We aren’t helping you to leave you. Life is about relationships and serving. There are so many rich people in the world who are mentally poor.

WR: Your Husband was recently awarded the Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year. What type of impact has this had on you and your family?

DB: It’s impacted us in two ways. It has afforded us a platform to get our message out to a different group. This year as well as the year before he was nominated, we’ve seen such a jump in interest. I also like the notoriety of this award. The NFL finally displaying a positive light on the men enables me to appreciate the League for putting this award, front and center. There are so many guys doing the same kind of work who are as deserving. Secondly, we have been able to spend some personal time with the Payton Family. Growing up, Walter Payton was Anquan’s hero. They (The Paytons) are “who they say they are” and they are great people to be around.

IN CONCLUSION

WR: That is powerful. Shifting a bit as it’s wedding season and you have been married for over 10 years now. Every day, we see another picture of a beautiful bride. Before we wrap up, do you have any veteran marriage advice or tips for a newlywed?

DB: I have learned to prioritize one another and even before your kids. Prioritize your marriage and your spouse, which seems difficult when we have babies running around but putting kids in their place has helped us a lot. During the season, I do what’s uncomfortable for me and sometimes that requires me to do what’s not physically comfortable because I travel to every game. It gives us some time alone so I make it a priority. Keep people out of your business! That means not involving your girlfriends or your mother or father but keep your business at home. In the world of sports, there are a lot of insecurities floating around and rightfully so but, give your husband the opportunity to protect you.

WR: You seem like a lady who gets "it" all done!  Tell us, what do you do in your home that no one else can do?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jq626fEPjzQ

How Financially Responsible Are You?

1. 78% of NFL players are bankrupt or dealing with deep financial stress within two years of retirement
2. Athletes will likely earn 70-90% of their lifetime earnings before age 35
3. The average NFL career lasts 3.3 years

Don't those statistics just put you in a great mood? After seeing the numbers, it's no surprise that money has been one of the biggest arguments in our household. Especially with the added stress of such a generous amount of money coming in for such a short period of time--and everyone knowing about it. Money is one of the top five areas the average couple fights about, so take some time and evaluate your financial responsibilities. I wish I could take you back to high school and provide you with a fun, Cosmopolitan-esque quiz, but this will have to do...

Financial Transparency

Deception comes in many shapes and sizes and is one of the hardest things to deal with when money is involved. Salary, spending, giving, saving, etc. should all be discussed and talked about regularly. Omitting/hiding spending is a slippery slope that can end up hurting your partner and your family's future. Make sure to sit down with each other and discuss your spending boundaries and habits.

money meme 2

• Have you and your spouse made and maintained a budget?
• Do you hide or omit spending from your significant other?
• Do either of you make big, financial decisions without discussing it first?

Financial Adviser

Having a relationship with your financial adviser is crucial in maintaining a healthy financial status. Monitoring your monthly statements ensures your money is being properly handled.

• Where is your money being allocated?
• Does your financial adviser have POA (Power of Attorney)?
• What are you paying your adviser each year?

Debt

Buying things we can't afford is an American tradition. Break the cycle by making smart decisions. Plan out your debt-free goals and also your expectations on how to achieve those goals.

• What's your family's collective debt?
• How much are you spending on interest for things you could pay off now?
• What's your credit score and are you monitoring and maintaining it?

Giving or Lending

kevin hart

This is usually the hardest financial area to compromise on within a relationship. Attempt to keep open communication with your partner on your thoughts and feelings when it comes to giving out money. Make sure you map out how you, as a couple, will handle people when they come to you for money.

• Are people taking advantage of you and your financial situation?
• Do they expect you to give/lend them money (it's never fair for someone to make you feel guilty for their own situation)?
• Are they living above their means(cable packages, dining out, phone plans, etc.)?

I realize these topics can get heated and have a lot of emotion behind them. My hope is that the discussion of finances doesn't overwhelm you but actually empower you to take control of your future.

Further Reading:

http://www.nflplayerengagement.com/financial-education/

https://www.nflpa.com/financial-advisors

http://www.forbes.com/sites/leighsteinberg/2015/02/09/5-reasons-why-80-of-retired-nfl-players-go-broke/#14eb5ffb4e36

Behind the Scenes-From the Lens of a Scouting WAG

When thinking of the NFL, the first thing most people think of is the players which was my initial thought as well. Then, I met Jim and realized all the work that goes into the “behind the scenes” aspect of the NFL. With that being said, I am so excited to share with you ladies my views of being a girlfriend of a scout. It all started last summer when my boyfriend got a job as the scouting intern for the Kansas City Chiefs. He is a former football player and when he mentioned he got the job with the Chiefs, I was so excited for him that he was still able to work around his passion for football! Downside of things: it was 1,300 miles away from me in Connecticut. Our relationship was long distance for the majority of our time together. I was a dance teacher back in Connecticut and not ready to leave my students, while he was going to be a busy intern and traveling played a huge role in his job. Moving to a new city, not knowing anyone and having Jim travel a lot was terrifying to me so I was ready to take on the challenge of a long distance relationship! Trust me when I say last season was not an easy time and the distance really showed us how strong our love is.

Fast forward to this season! I have officially moved and joined Jim in Kansas City and I couldn’t be happier. Jim is no longer an intern and is now working full time for the team and I am ready to take on this season. Since I know what is coming, I am much more prepared for the amount of traveling that goes into scouting and all the late nights that are ahead! Living with him now will make a huge difference in our relationship because when he travels, I know he will be coming home to me soon enough. Last year was very hard trying to coordinate weekends that he wasn’t traveling with weekends I wasn’t involved in a show with my dance students. I would go one to three months without seeing him and it never became easier.

Thankfully, we no longer have to do that and let me tell you it was worth the wait! I am so excited to experience Kansas City and Chiefs Kingdom! Recently, I was able to go to a few training camp practices and the first preseason game where I felt so welcomed by the Chiefs and it was nice to talk to some other wives and girlfriends of scouts! I look forward to meeting more ladies and can’t wait to continue to share my journey!

Featured WAG: Behind the Brand with The Diamond Duchess, Leah Miller

You know her. We love her. She is one of us! Meet Leah Miller, better known as The Diamond Duchess and the face behind the most amazing, customized, crystallized pieces in the game. When she isn't creating masterpieces for yourself and your little ones, she is building an empire that embodies the principle of "do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life." Leah is wife to retired NFL veteran QB, Jim Miller, and mother to three (plus one on the way!). She is a Believer and a genuinely beautiful "BOSS" who shines bright like a diamond.

"I give all glory to God! All of His door openings, all of His vision and all of His ideas that I have received have taken Bella to where it is today. I know that it is ALL HIM because I work from my home studio, in a basement in Michigan. Who on earth would ever see me or what I do if it weren't for HIM?!? No one would know about me if it were not for HIM."

Name: Leah Paulovich Miller, Founder of Bella Artistry

Player/Team(s): Jim Miller (QB) Steelers, Jaguars, Atlanta, Detroit, Chicago, Tampa Bay, Patriots, Giants

Children: 3 (Sophia-14, Emmanuel “Manny”-9, King James “KJ” -2) and one on the way arriving November 2016.

Kanye or Carrie Underwood? Carrie

Ice Cream or Potato Chips? Ice Cream

Yoga or Spin? Neither

Manicure or Massage? Manicure

Where are you originally from and how did you get to where you are now?

I am originally from Pittsburgh. We (my family and I) now live in Michigan near Jim’s hometown. Oddly enough, we don’t have family here anymore but he started a custom home building company when he was playing here so he wanted to be near the company after he retired from the NFL.

How did you meet your Husband?

I was in college during my senior year at the University of Pittsburgh. I met Jim three days after the Super Bowl (96’), the Steelers had just lost that year (that was actually the first football game I ever watched on purpose). Ironically, I was actually dating an Olympic wrestler at the time and he was supposed to meet me out that night but he didn’t show up for some reason. That was the night I met Jim. I dated both of them for a little while. The funny part is that they were both "hometown heros" and would be invited to be on the same celebrity panels at a lot of the same events in the area. It was quite surreal when Jim was starting his first game in the NFL and the wrestler was at the game to flip the pre game coin while I watched from the stands. After awhile Jim and I started dating exclusively and we dated for three and a half years before getting married. We got married in Vegas. We didn’t elope but we knew there would not be enough time between him popping the question and me planning the wedding of my dreams during the offseason. We’ve been married 17 years.

Tell us about some of your most favorite WAGS memories?

The Super Bowl, of course. Even though Jim was the backup to Tom (Brady), we were still a part of the team and you can’t compare anything to that experience. I would also say I enjoy the lifelong friendships that you create. I know women all over the world from all walks of life because our paths crossed in the NFL. We don’t talk every day but, when we do, it’s like we have not missed a beat. My business (Bella Artistry) was born out of that time in our lives. I owe a lot of credit to that part of our lives for the niche I am in now.

As the wife of a retired player, how does your day to day differ from when Jim was still playing?

Jim is retired from playing but still involved with the NFL and fully immersed in football. So, my busy schedule and his still revolves around the NFL. Out of all of Bella Artistry's sports clients, the NFL clients make up 80% of our business, so my busy season ends up being the same as his. Jim is still gone three to four days out of the week and he travels more now that when he was playing in the NFL. During NFL season/school year I get up at about 5:15 to get my kids going and get ready for my staff of 13-21 (depending on time of year) to arrive. On the business side of my life, when you own your company- work doesn’t stop. You don't get to clock out and forget about it until the next day. But that's okay because I love to be busy and feel so much more accomplished when I have worked a 16-hour workday. For me, having my own "thing" is more enjoyable than working out, cooking dinner, house stuff and waiting for Jim to get home from football practice. I was busy then (when he was playing) but, this busy is “times 1000” and I LOVE work. My children are my most perfect creations and I am so grateful that I have been able to work from home for so long and spend as much time with them as I can.

What advice would you have for WAGS trying to find the balance between their own identity and that of their men?

My tip for anyone is to find something you love, to make it your job and to get your own identity outside of who “he” is. When the crap hits the fan after football is over (and EVERYONE will go through a period of transition), if the wife has something of her own then they are more likely to stay married. Find out what is important to you because football does not last long. I never liked the idea of being “Jim Miller’s wife.” Funny story, a few years ago at the Super Bowl someone came up to my husband and asked, "Aren’t you Leah Miller’s husband"? I got the biggest kick out of it! For years, I prayed that God would make me independent, self-reliant, and self-sufficient and He did it. I don't have to rely on anyone but God. Even if your spouse isn’t on board (with what you spiritually believe in), God will ensure that you have the desires of your heart if you make HIM your number one.

How did The Diamond Duchess concept and brand develop? You create the most amazing pieces, Leah!

I appreciate that. I’m touched by your kind compliment. I was an art major by training (my bachelor's is in painting and sculpting) and I worked for my father’s marketing firm for eight years and did really well for myself. I was making six figures on my own before I got married. Part of our (Jim and my) deal was that during the offseason we would live in Pittsburgh so I would still be able to work for my parents' company and travel back and forth from our in season locale to continue to service my clients. But when it was time to make the move, Jim didn’t want to move. So I was forced to leave my job. There was only so much shopping, cooking and cleaning I could do before I lost my mind. So I decided to cultivate my first love, which is murals and furniture. I started a painting company and painted furniture and murals for doctor’s offices, other player’s homes and other clients for about two years until I got pregnant. One day while pregnant with my first baby, I was working on scaffolding painting on the ceiling of a doctor’s office and caused myself some serious issues; I almost lost my first baby because the work was more dangerous than I realized. I knew then that I had to come back home.

What were the early days like?

When we first got into the league, there was not a lot of team-related things to wear to your husband’s games except a big, boxy jersey from his locker or the same one everyone else was wearing from the team store. I started creating because I didn’t want to wear something like that and there weren’t any other women’s sports clothes options. They didn't make any women's jerseys then. I had already been designing with crystals and other embellishments and would do pieces for myself and my girlfriends to wear to games or as gifts. Word would eventually spread as my friends moved from team to team so Bella just got bigger and bigger. At first, I did it for free but while we were in Palm Beach during one of Jim’s recoveries (2003, I believe), I began to charge a fee and made it into a business.

What are some of your favorite items you’ve created?

I really like designing shoes and I like to see footballs completed. I design every single piece that goes through the company. At any given time of year, I can have up to 21 wonderful and talented seamstresses and artists working at Bella bringing my ideas to reality. During Super Bowl Season, I had a team of 21 ladies working double shifts to get all 90 orders done in a 10 day period. I still say that accomplishment was miraculous! I prayed and prayed God would help us get our orders completed on time and we finished everything in 9 days (plus some of the orders for the girls on the waiting list)! Having something you've designed in your head and scribbled on paper come into existence from almost nothing but a pile of materials and Crystal is very rewarding.

This was a big wedding year for you, wasn’t it?

Yes, we were honored to be asked to create for some of the most fabulous weddings of the year. Nina and Earl Thomas, Gypsy and Aqib Talib, Cannon and Collins Tuohy Smith and Risalyn and DeAngelo Williams were some of my biggest weddings this year. We are honored to even be asked to create for such a special day. It’s up there next to the Super Bowl. Also, the volume of work is great to have, especially in the off season. Nina Thomas, for instance, had 22 robes, 15 jerseys and glasses made for the ceremony. The wives are pulling out all of the stops for their big day and they want it to be the best of the best so it’s an honor to be included in that. What’s your big picture for the brand?

We are currently working on our new storefront and studio. Our house is on a lake and so is our new location. We’ve slowly been refurbishing an area that is literally a “stones throw” from my house. We started it about two years ago but, over the past year I’ve really been working hard to get in the new space. My next goal is to complete it by the time the baby comes (God willing). The new location will quadruple our working space and we will have a storefront that will allow people to come in and design their own furniture, clothes and accessories; Customers will be able to procure our seamstresses on staff for alterations and custom clothing as well. You have accomplished some really beautiful moments over the past decade. If you were not an entrepreneur, what would you be doing instead?

Well, I always make jokes that my mom and I would open up our own Private Investigator/ Interior Design Firm! I do love to do interior design AND use my superb sleuthing skills. I am very much like my mom (and dad) because they are very artistic and brilliant business people. I hope to become half of what they are.

I have to say that looking back on where I have come from is amazing. I honestly started my company in my spare closet. To go from just me in a 5'x8' closet to 21 people with 4000 sq. feet makes me teary-eyed. I give all glory to God! All of His door openings, all of His vision and all of His ideas that I have received have taken Bella to where it is today. I know that it is ALL HIM because I work from my home studio, in a basement in Michigan. Who on earth would ever see me or what I do if it weren't for HIM?!? No one would know about me if it were not for HIM.

Check out more of Leah's work on Instagram @thediamondduchess or online at www.bellaartistry.com

3 verses to remember while our men are away!

By: Jacqui Butler

Keep these verses in a safe place to reference during training camp, preseason and beyond!

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer" -Romans 12:12

This is my favorite verse for this season of our lives because it covers all the bases! Maintaining a positive outlook for our men is imperative. Our patience when the conversations are short or when frustration sets in is huge. Above all -Prayer, Prayer, Prayer! -is needed, faithfully covering their bodies, minds and spirits.

"Each of you should use whatever gift you have to serve others, as faithful stewards of God's grace in its various forms." -1 Peter 4:10

As a busy wife and mom, sometimes it feels like I serve others all day long! But this verse reminds me to REALLY serve them; it pushes me to make sure I’m remembering to personally demonstrate things like faith and forgiveness every day. Whether you have children or don’t, whatever you’re doing, whatever your talents are, God can use it to encourage someone, inspire them or at the very least spark curiosity about God’s hand on their lives!

"The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." -Proverbs 14:1

This is a reminder that you have such POWER!! There is power in your actions, attitudes, and your words. Make sure you are building up your men, building up your children, and don’t forget to build up yourself!

Committed to the Cause

Luke 14: 28, “For which of you, wanting to build a tower, doesn’t first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it?” 2 Chronicles 15:7,” But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”

Known for many things, women are definitely supporters, nurturers and builders. On a daily basis, you are building relationships, family, businesses, yourselves, community, and most importantly the men God entrusted you with to support. Training camp can be a very stressful time for any NFL family and it seems to come around extremely fast year after year.

As your men are out on the gridiron laying foundations that bring safety nets for your family that will ultimately build an incredible legacy, build alongside him and help him in every area that he may be lacking. God has graced you and gifted you with incredible insight, strategies, wisdom, knowledge and understanding, which are assets and keys to building solid foundations. Many of you are mothers or preparing to become mothers and are trying to ensure that your children are well cared for and safe. Ask God to give you all strength and power to run your household, take care of your children, maintain all of your business affairs and support your husbands, boyfriends and fiancés through the toughest time of the season.

For every builder must count the cost of building a great future and I know each of you counted the cost and examined all of the sacrifices that would come along with being a part of the NFL. You are helping to build something that will benefit generations to come. Every day that you feel tired, frustrated, lonely and ready to give up, know that God is your ultimate contractor and He has all of the plans, details, materials, resources and support workers (called angels) to ensure that your building is completed.No one knows the strength that each of you hold, the grace and the stability that you exercise daily to keep everything together. God has given you a team of co-laborers (other WAGS) that are working alongside of you to encourage you, push you, and give you some extra support to help you and your mate complete your “tower”. Remain committed to the cause and watch God’s commitment to you bring joy, peace, patience and rest.

Hebrews 13:5 says, “I will never leave you or forsake you.” God is committed to you in every way. He is there for whatever you need when you need it. Call on Him day or night!

Let’s Pray…

Father, I thank you for the women who are committed to the cause. Give them everything that is necessary to build alongside the men you have given them to help. As they are building, allow them not to become weary in their well doing. Strengthen for the cause, grant unto them peace, understanding, long-suffering, joy and sustainability. Surround them with support, encouragement and arm-lifters when they are tired. Provide them with resources, knowledge and materials that are necessary to complete every task.

Allow them to feel loved and allow them to give love. While in the building process, allow them to remain patient and have great expectation for their desired outcome. Hold their men accountable to your word and instruction and let these women follow their men as they follow Christ. Release peace in their homes and allow them to remain blessed in their coming and in their going. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.

Game Changers 180 offers prayer and counseling services to NFL families, for more information please email info@gamechangers180.com

Camp 101: DON'T FORGET THE ESSENTIALS!

Written by Contributors, Angel Palacios & Grace Allen

Grace Allen

Married to: Ricardo Allen, Falcons

Oh, for the love of camp. No, not your favorite summer camp, or “glamping" with your best girlfriends, but, the, ever anticipated FOOTBALL TRAINING CAMP. If you are anything like me, you feel as if those super anticipated four weeks off are going to magically last forever, and then before you know it, you're packing your mans belongings and sending him away for what you and I (and they) know will be a stress packed few weeks away from home. Saying goodbye to the man of the home is never easy, especially when the kiddos have to say goodbye to daddy too. With the recommendation of a fellow WAG, Angel and I have decided to collaborate to come up with a simplified “Camp Packing List” to make your life (and ours) a bit easier. Take what speaks to you, and leave the rest! Happy packing & happy football season!

1. His Bible (or other form of inspiration)

If your man is strong in his faith, don't let him leave home to face the stressors of training camp without The Word in his bag. To make it even easier on him (and to make it feel like you’re right there with him) use post-it notes, or somehow tab specific verses with notes along the lines of “read this when you need to be encouraged”, “read this when you are tired”, “read this when you need to be reminded of how valuable you are”, etc.

2. Pictures

There is nothing like a photo to capture a memory, or to cause you to feel a certain emotion (just look at my instagram and you'll know immediately how much I cherish capturing everything in picture form:). Print off some of your favorite photos of the two of you, your family, pets, etc. There is a really cool feature with the Walgreens app that allows you to print off your Instagram photos in the perfect,little, Instagram squares (hello efficiency, simplicity and being able to fit more in a locker).

3. Epsom Salt

Lots of long and tiring hours in the heat and sun leads to sore and achy muscles. One of my favorite things to do for R is to run him an epsom salt bath. Sometimes, if I am feeling extra fancy, i’ll add a few drops of Lavender essential oil to help him relax his mind, as well as his body. My favorite brand is Dr. Teal’s, you can pick it up mostly anywhere, but I typically grab it at Target (because who doesn't want an excuse to make a Target run?:) Dr. Teal’s actually makes a bag that is infused with the lavender essential oil, so its a two for one deal!

4. Snacks

If you have ever looked at the schedule for a day of camp, it is structured down to the minute, every minute, including meals. All of the energy that is exerted has to be replaced through food and beverages. I know that the Falcons have an amazing staff that prepares the guys fresh foods during the day, but I don’t quite know what happens at night as far as food and snacks are concerned (and I have a notorious nighttime snacker on my hands). I always send along a box of snacks that are high in protein and carbohydrates, as well as a few guilty pleasure favorites as well. Trail mix, beef jerky, almonds, pistachios, peanut butter pretzels are all great choices. 5. Lucky Items If your guy has any type of superstitious lucky items, don't forget to send them along! Im not going to name any names, but, I know a man that has an extensive collection of superhero socks….and you better believe that a pair, or two, will be making their way to Falcons training camp! xoxo, Grace Allen

Angel Palacios

Married to: Tevin Mitchel, Raiders

Hey y'all! It's that time of the year again! Season is right around the corner!!! I am praying for everyone's safety as we all head to different places and our hubby's head to camp. Can we all just agree that the month they have off is never quite long enough?!

Here's a picture of my babies at the Cincinnati Zoo saying goodbye before we head back to Texas during camp!

As much as we like to complain about them having to leave, Camp is by far one of the toughest sections of the entire season. So what can we do to help?

Pack or send them a fun basket!

1. The essentials

There is no doubt they forgot or lost AT LEAST one thing on this list, so sending these items is a must:

Tooth brush

Tooth paste

Deodorant

Razors

Shaving Cream

2. Family Pictures

Something to put in their locker for motivation, or even just to brighten their day!

3. Favorite Snacks

Of course they can't consume too much junk food, but hey a little pick me up snack never hurt anyone😊

4. Motivation

 My favorite thing to do is write down a list of bible verses that he can reflect on that can help give him a peace of mind even when I'm not around to do so!

Featured WAG: Katie Levitre

Down to Earth, gorgeous, ambitious, genuine; ½ of a dynamic duo is Katie Levitre; former sideline reporter, Bills cheerleader and wife of Andy Levitre, offensive lineman for the Atlanta Falcons.  If you haven’t met Katie, then you are in for a real treat as we chatted about everything from how she met her husband (“love at 2nd sight”) to what she is passionate about (hint, her family and empowering other NFL WAGS).

Name: Katie Levitre

Husband/Team(s): Andy Levitre/ Atlanta Falcons (formerly the Tennessee Titans & Buffalo Bills)

What #hashtag describes you best?

#multihyphenate

"A large percentage of us don’t work outside of the home because of how much we move, so we don’t have something outside of marriage and children to call our own. I am definitely lucky that Andy always goes out of his way to make sure I am comfortable and made to feel just as important as he is, regardless of the situation. Having someone like him as my husband can make this hard transition a lot easier. I have always been a career driven, independent woman and Andy still treats me like one." Katie Levitre

Who is Katie?  Where are you originally from and how did you get to where are now?

I was born and raised in Buffalo, New York.  Since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to be a journalist, specifically a broadcast journalist.  I am passionate about writing and speaking and have always been comfortable performing in front of large groups of people.  I graduated #1 in my journalism class from Buffalo State College and immediately pursued my career.  I started with an internship at the local NBC station then freelanced for an entertainment website run by the Buffalo News.  I moved on to sideline reporting for Time Warner Sports for a year.  In early 2013 I was up for a full-time reporting job at one of the top 3 news stations at the same time Andy was ready to move back to California for his first off-season as a free agent.   When he asked me to move with him, I had to make a decision that I knew would affect the rest of my life.  I was deciding between love and my career.   I knew the NFL lifestyle wouldn’t be conducive to my life as a journalist.  In the end I know I made the right decision by choosing Andy.  It’s easy to think about what life could have been if I had chosen to follow my dreams, but no part of me regrets my decision.  If I had to do it all again, I would choose love every time.  

How did you meet your Husband?

Andy and I met at a children’s toy drive hosted by the Buffalo Bills.  It was his rookie year playing Left Guard for the Bills and my rookie year as a Buffalo Bills cheerleader.   We spoke briefly at the event but there was no romantic spark (and thank God, or I would have been kicked off the squad!).   Two years after we met, he walked into the bar I was bartending at in college and we both got that butterflies in the tummy, hearts in the eyes feeling.  We think of it like love at second sight.  There is something so beautiful about timing.  We were both in such a stable place when we met the second time around, it was almost as if fate wanted us to wait a little while to really find our soul mate.

Tell us about your day to day?

I am a big spin fan!  They have a great place in Atlanta here called Flywheel and the instructors are amazing.  I finally understand what people mean when they say they get “addicted” to a workout.  After spin, I run a lot of errands and take care of our house(s).   I am a dedicated mommy to two French Bulldogs and as anyone with a Frenchie knows, they are quite high maintenance!   I also love to cook, which you can imagine is quite enticing to an Offensive Lineman! ;)

What’s your game plan when adjusting to a new city?

I am in the process of trying to downsize everything!  Andy and I have lived in 4 states in the past 3 years.  My usual game plan was to pack 3,000 bags and hope I had enough.  But now I am trying to get rid of things I don’t need so I can alleviate some stress when we go back and forth to our home in California during the off-season.  When it comes to making new friends and feeling at home in a new city, it definitively isn’t always easy.  Each football city has been totally different for us.  I remember my first year dating Andy in Buffalo, some of the veteran’s wives told me that they don’t give new girls or girlfriends the time of day because they don’t know whether they’re going to be around for long.  I remember thinking how sad that was! But, now I sort of get it.  I will ALWAYS be welcoming and kind to new people but it can be so hard to find friends that you absolutely love only to have one of you leave the next year.   In a sense it’s like starting your social life over from scratch every year, not to mention if you’re like us and live in another state in the off-season.   Sometimes you just have to take it one day at a time and do your best to make this crazy life feel normal.   I’ve been blessed to meet some really incredible people along the way.

What are some of the challenges of being married to an NFL player and what do you like about it?

I think when some people find out you’re married to a man in the NFL they automatically think your husband must be cheating or constantly followed around by women.  It may be true for a small portion of the league but for the majority of us- that is definitely not the case. To be honest, its not the women at all- it’s the grown men that are big football fans!! Haha! I joke that I could be standing next to Andy naked and if a guy finds out he plays football they wouldn’t even notice me!  In all seriousness though, it can be easy to feel like you’ve lost a big part of your identity.  A large percentage of us don’t work outside of the home because of how much we move, so we don’t have something outside of marriage and children to call our own.   I am definitely lucky that Andy always goes out of his way to make sure I am comfortable and made to feel just as important as he is, regardless of the situation.  Having someone like him as my husband can make this hard transition a lot easier.  I have always been a career driven, independent woman and Andy still treats me like one.

What are you passionate about?

My family is my greatest love.  I love being a wife, a dog mom, a daughter, sister & daughter-in-law. There is nothing more important to me than the people who surround me.  Something else I’ve been passionate about lately is giving not only myself, but also every woman in the NFL a chance to stand on her own.    I want to be known as Katie Levitre, not “Andy’s Levitre’s wife” or “the football player’s wife” and I know other women feel the same.   Solely identifying as someone’s wife or someone’s mother is not AT ALL a bad thing, but I want to give women a chance to have something outside of the home to call their own if that is what they want.   People outside of professional sports don’t understand that its not glitz and glam; women have to leave their families, friends, homes and careers to support their significant others.   In every city and on every team we’ve been on at least 5 women have told me that they wish they could work but “no one wants to hire someone for 5 months of the year.”  So, I’m making moves to try to change that.  I recently spoke with someone from the NFLPA about helping women find companies that would be interested in hiring us in the cities we live in during the season.  After all, we are a league full of intelligent, hardworking and mature women!  

Tell us about your babies, the bulldogs!

Awww, my babies! They are amazing!  I got Titan right after Andy got signed with Tennessee, hence the name.  We had to find a dog that could travel in a plane with us and Andy and I both didn’t want anything too fluffy.  We were deciding between a French Bulldog and a Pug- until we heard that pugs eyes can pop out when they get too excited!  We found Titan (who is blue with tan paws and a white chest) in Dallas.  Four months later, I had puppy fever all over again and Andy surprised me for Christmas with a little black and tan Frenchie puppy.  I always wanted to name a little girl Olive, but Andy wasn’t in to naming a human baby after a food- haha! So, my little black puppy became my Olive.  They are my only children for now and I spoil them accordingly!

Love it!  Now for something a little less rigorous; a fun question for you:

What do you do in your home that no one else can do?  Lights, Camera, Action!

[iframe id="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jUU9NBASRtw"]

"My Experience at Super Bowl 50": Contest Winner Shares Highlights

Entry written by Super Bowl Contest winner: Angela Porras

Going to the Super Bowl has always been #1 on my bucket list, and is considered a once in a lifetime opportunity for most people. When I found out I had won the contest run by NFL WAGS, I was beside myself. Not only was I ticking this dream off the list, but my favorite team of all time was actually playing! I don't know what the chances of this happening is, but it happened, and there were a lot of things to organize leading up to it. It was a whirlwind trip, but the best experience of my life to date.  I just wanted to give a special thank you to LeShonda Martin and WAGS Redefined for gifting me with this amazing experience (two tickets to the Super Bowl)! I don't know if I would have ever had the chance to do something as special as this, and it meant everything to myself and my guest, CJ. We are forever grateful.

Words couldn't describe my experience, but I hope the pictures will help.

I was still in Australia when I was informed of my win, and wasn't set to come home for a few weeks. I quickly rearranged my flights from L.A. to San Francisco and packed my bags to leave a few days later!

Trying to book a hotel a week before the Super Bowl would have been a nightmare if not for a dear friend residing in SF. Not a bad view! The luck continues...

Once settled in, I had to explore the city. It was still very surreal at this point. San Francisco had really put a lot of effort into transforming the city for the big event!

It's not every day you get to wander the streets and cross paths with NFL Legend Marshall Faulk! Throughout the week, many NFL players engaged positively with fans, and if you were lucky enough some of them even became your Lyft driver!

There were parties everywhere, even on Fisherman's Wharf! Some more exclusive than others, like this Denver Broncos fan party. My invitation was lost in the mail, but that didn't stop me from crashing it!

It wouldn't be a dream vacation without a little shopping. Not sure these are for me but just think: Someone in the world owns these shoes.

The night before the big game, Thomas Davis found out I played women's football. He was so impressed he called up David Gettleman and they put me on the roster. I didn't even have to try out. What are the chances? Not sure how Cam is gonna feel when he finds out he has to change his number.

As you can see, I fit in just fine!

Finally! IT IS GAME DAY. I've never been more excited to be  smashed among the masses as we waited to get in!

The Super Bowl was a star studded event! Elvis even made an appearance, and he roots for the Panthers!!!

Sometimes you just need a larger than life LUUUUUUUUKE.

Here is the most surreal moment of the entire trip. I don't know how to explain the feeling I had taking this photo, seeing this field, getting ready to cheer on the Panthers. Soon after this photo was taken, Lady Gaga took the stage and gave a phenomenal performance of our National Anthem. It was truly an amazing experience.

The Panthers weren't doing so well going into the half, but in all honesty, it was REALLY hard to care once Beyonce hit the stage! All of the performers were incredible, but who can top Queen Bey?!

CJ and I were finally reunited on American soil on game day and had an incredible experience together, and I could not have won this competition without her. She had a crazier schedule than I did, and had no plans to travel to the U.S. until we won this competition. The day after the Super Bowl she flew back to Australia to participate in a football camp to try out for the Australian team!

The outcome of the game wasn't what I had hoped for but I still left that stadium feeling like a winner. A lot of people apologized to me when I returned home, which was confusing. You win some, you lose some and it's your attitude that determines where to go from here. If I had known my team would lose, I wouldn't change a thing.

- Angela

Mastering Life: NFL & Beyond

xiaandchimdigrad

A few weeks ago I graduated from the University of Miami with my Master’s in Business Administration. This is my 3rd degree. Yes I know it sounds a bit ridiculous, but I’m what some people call a career student. I thrive on studying my days away, then complaining and counting down the days to freedom from homework, group projects and exams. I don’t know why I continue to torture myself but for some reason I keep going back. You would think that after earning my bachelor’s degree in journalism from The Ohio State University and a master’s from Texas Tech in Mass Communications I would have had enough of school, but when an opportunity to pursue my MBA degree came along I couldn’t say no to the opportunity to complete more education. Executive MBA for Artist and Athletes:

The Executive MBA for Artist and Athletes at the University of Miami is a program designed to help professional athletes and their significant other or business partner earn their Master’s in Business Administration in an 18-month long program. The program is completed in six 2-week sessions during the offseason and three online classes during the season. To be honest I had no idea what to expect and I was nervous about doing the program since I was only one of two women joining the incoming class. I knew I would have my husband by my side and the classes would be challenging, but I wasn’t sure how a group of football players would be in the classroom. Upon starting class I quickly learned my classmates were a fun group of guys that were extremely focused and had a strong work ethic.

Perception Not Equal To Reality:

IconEmba_Graduation_Miami0516_043

Being surrounded by such a driven group of individuals made me realize the media often portrays our guys in a negative light. All of my classmates were the complete opposite of how we often see football players characterized. The reality is most of them had established businesses and non-profits prior to joining the program and were working towards building legacies that would sustain their success well beyond football. Several of my classmates were and are some of the top players in the league and had reached what some would call the highest height of achievement by making it to the NFL, and yet they still chose to pursue higher education. These aren’t the images we often see so I’m glad I have this platform to show that these guys are more than just football players. They are great fathers, businessmen and leaders who continue to strive for more than the glory of the game and they deserve to be recognized for their contributions on and of the field.

Greater Lesson:

Being in a class of football players I was reminded of how blessed I am to be a part of such a great league but the reality is the NFL is "not for long." The NFL has afforded many of us with the opportunity to build great networks and to travel and experience things that some people only dream of.  Although the ride is often fun, it goes by so fast. I realized the best lesson that I can take away from completing the program didn’t come from my professors or my textbooks, but from the very men I sat next to every day. Their work ethic taught me to go after my passions and dreams, to keep learning and networking and to take advantage of all the resources this league has afforded my husband and I.

weh quote

My husband is going into his sixth season and I must admit in the beginning of his career it felt like football would last forever. Now that we are much closer to retirement than we are to rookie season the reality has set in to enjoy it while it lasts but to also get prepared for the day when it will all be over.  For many of us women this may be a little more difficult trying to juggle being a wife or a girlfriend, having families and being supportive to our men, but that’s ok. It’s never too late to start fresh just as long as you start. One of greatest gifts we can give everyone around us is to not give up on our dreams and goals no matter what. For some that means picking up that hobby or dream that was set aside temporarily, for others that means trying something new or challenging or maybe going back to school to earn a degree or two.  Whatever it may be I strongly encourage you to take advantage of today. We do not know what tomorrow will bring but we have the ability and power to impact tomorrow by what we do today.

My MBA program taught me a lot about business but so much more about mastering life. Never stop learning, never stop growing and don’t be afraid to take risks. I hope my journey encourages you just a little to jump in head first and do whatever your hearts desire and if you're already doing so kudos to you!

For more information about Executive MBA for Artists and Athletes program feel free to email Jennifer at Jennifer@miamiemba2.com for more information.

XOXO,

Xia

20 Things I would tell my 20-Year-Old Self

 “A voice for NFL wives, fiancees and girlfriends while connecting, inspiring, and empowering our audience. We desire to influence our community by changing the conversation.”  It’s refreshing to come across a mission statement like this in a world where people seem to connect more readily over superficial things and values.  LeShonda Martin created WAGS Redefined with the intent for it to be everything that her mission encompasses.  I feel like it’s only appropriate for my first blog post to thank LeShonda for creating a faith-based community for women to connect and also to share a real life example of a connection I made as a result of her efforts. I recently met @CieraLiguori through @NFLWags when we realized we were both in the LA area.  We met for coffee in Santa Monica the other day and spent three hours chatting all things “real.”  Ciera is just beginning the journey through her 20’s while this gal over here is savoring the last year of it :-) It got me thinking about this past decade of my life and some of the things I have learned…and am still continuing to learn.

• I learned the phrase “Train your Eyes” recently…learn to look at challenges from a different perspective. Be grateful for the things that DON’T go your way…these are the moments you really grow and really get to know yourself.  
• Time is valuable.  Don’t waste it on trivial things. Be more selfish with your time and give it to those that truly matter.
• If you hate your job you need to find a new one. A career can take over your soul especially when you get comfortable with a paycheck.  Stop and make sure what you’re doing aligns with your God-given gifts & abilities.
• You’ll be OK…whatever you're going through, no matter how hard it is, in time you will be OK.
• Learn to love your body…flaws and all. Eliminate the word diet from your vocabulary. Everything in moderation and drink more water.
• Learn the art of taking power naps.
• Change is scary and uncomfortable. Just know that the first step is the hardest.
• Don’t gossip.        
• Be patient with your parents…they aren’t getting any younger.
• Travel every opportunity you get! And do things that scare you. Mine included riding in a helicopter, and zip lining.
• Volunteer…anything that makes you think outside of yourself.
• Read more!!! From blogs to books, make this part of your daily routine. (Currently reading: Purpose Driven Life)
• There’s strength in vulnerability…there’s also a fine line between vulnerable and victim.
• Spend time alone everyday.
• BE KIND.

5 Tips to Simplify Dinner

As an NFL wife, student, business owner and human google search engine for all of my friends and family on things nutrition, my plate is always full. I don't doubt for one second that you can relate when I say we women will often times live in complexity to simplify the lives of others! And really we don't mind because we are naturals at it and usually bask in the refreshing feeling of having checked off everything on our to-do list for the day. But even though we are the masters of multitasking and seem to always have the right answers to combat any uncertainty, why is it so hard to answer the question "what will we have for dinner?"

If you are the cook in your household then you know that the main answer to this questions is quite frank: because dinner is never as simple as it sounds. It requires creating a meal that satisfies tastebuds, keeps complaints to a minimum, avoids unrequested repetition, meets nutritional needs and contains just enough food so that you don't have to remind yourself to be a joyful giver as you stingily give away your personal portions to a husband that needs over 3000 calories. Honestly, its like Burger King should have to pay us every time we allow someone to "have it their way" when it comes to dinner time. Constantly trying to strive to make this process easier for myself personally, I have put together a (almost) perfected list of how to make dinner easier so that we too can enjoy some simplicity every now and then :)

1. Draw inspiration: Collect meal ideas from family members, in-laws, friends and even the WAGS Redefined site as inspiration for fresh and creative meals to avoid boredom. Also, checking out magazines while in line at the grocery store will always encourage a new bright idea that you and your family might enjoy!
2. Make a menu: Creating a menu for the upcoming week takes the guessing out of figuring out daily meals and it gives everyone a chance to put in their personal request for particular menu changes. Tell 'em speak now or forever hold their peace!
3. Always prepare EXTRA: Yes, YOU may be full after one plate but our guys tend to see that as just an appetizer. Making too much is always better than not making enough. Plus you can freeze extras or throw some leftovers in an awesome stir-fry for lunch the next day! Get creative...
4. Prep for the week: As a co-owner of a meal preparation company I know how much easier it is for families with busy lives to just open the refrigerator and grab a pre-portioned prepared meal. Turn into your own meal prep chef by preparing your meals for the week on the weekend. This saves time and is especially useful if there are just two of you like my husband and I.
5. Count servings, not calories: If your guy's team has a dietitian on staff, reach out to him or her to find out how many servings of macronutrients (carbohydrates, protein, and fat)  each of you need per meal. Use this as a guide when preparing your plates to give yourself some peace of mind that you are both eating exactly what you need nutritionally!

Behind The Brand: Raven Thomas, CEO of The Painted Pretzel

"At first, I didn’t want to do it.  I thought, 'Why would they pick me? I just make chocolate-covered pretzels. It’s not anything glamorous." - Raven Thomas, The Painted Pretzel

There are entrepreneurs and then there are business savvy, mini-moguls who appear on Shark Tank, command the respect and business partnership of heavy hitters such as Mark Cuban and land a life changing --deal of a lifetime overnight. Meet Raven Thomas. She is all of these and much more. I had the pleasure of learning about the woman Behind The Brand. She is genuine, Godly, humble, the wife of retired NFL player Eric Thomas and mother to two young boys. Raven is the Founder and CEO of The Painted Pretzel. Haven’t heard of her genius business and delicious brand? Get acquainted and get motivated!

Name: Raven Thomas

Husband: Eric Thomas

Anniversary: June 24, 2000

Occupation: Entrepreneur (thepaintedpretzel.com)

Husband’s Tenure and Teams: Started with the Jaguars, Buccaneers

Children: Two. Jeremiah (10), Aaron (8)

Cities You've Lived in with NFL: Jacksonville and Tampa

Home: Arizona

Favorite place to visit: San Diego

Your first car: Ford Contour

Music on your playlist: Adele and old school music like LL Cool J. I have a mix of old and new

Hobbies: I like to workout/exercise! CrossFit, Orange Theory Fitness and running sprints are my speed!

Your favorite memory: The day I met my husband.

Q&A

LM: Where are you from originally and how did you get to where you are now?

RT: I’m from Atlanta, Ga. I arrived in Arizona because of my husband’s work.

LM: How did you and your husband meet? What’s your love story?

RT: We met at a party our freshman year of college at FSU. We started talking because neither one of us were dancing and I wasn’t the type to have boyfriends. But he was different; we didn’t see each other again face to face for like a year. My friend used to be lab partners with another football player so I would have her spy in class. When they would do work, she would spy (on him). Fast forward to a few months later, we had a class together over the summer. Once we had that class together, the rest was history…that was 20 years ago.

ON THE NFL:

LM: What are some of the challenges of being married to an NFL player and what do you like about it?

RT: Well, we got married when we were 24 so we were young. A challenge for me was not being able to settle down in a way. We lived in Jacksonville but then we lived in Tampa. NFL sent him to NFL Europe and then he came back so it’s just very unstable. That part is hard. I ended up going back to school and getting my Masters but not when I wanted to because of the instability. When I did go back, I was flying back and forth. He wasn’t a superstar so it was more like “will he have a job next week?” and that part is also tough to deal with. It is stressful.  He was in the NFL for two years and then he played (in the) arena league. He had a stable contract with arena and he was very good at that. Of course the fact still remains that one injury could cause you to lose your job. When Eric left the game, he left on his own. His transition was very easy in that he didn’t long to play anymore.

LM: What is one piece of advice you can give to other women that you wish you would have known prior to your husband playing in the league?

RT: Probably that it’s not what I expected. I don’t know what I expected but I know it wasn’t that. Expect the unexpected! For a few families it’s different, but for the masses it is not glamorous!

LM: Do you believe there are any misconceptions or stereotypes of NFL WAGS? If so, what is your view?

RT: Yes. I think that a lot of times WAGS are seen as gold diggers or just trying to “come up”, get a meal ticket or are in it for the glamour (of it all). I remember someone told me, “Oh, you came up.” That was funny because we’ve been together since he was on the bench at FSU. Sometimes that (“come up”) does happen but overall with most of the women I’ve met, that’s not the case. The other misconception is that these women live off their husbands which is also not true.

ON SHARK TANK:

Editor’s Notes: The Painted Pretzel partnered with Mark Cuban for $100,000 in return for 25% equity in the pretzel business.  Result – The Painted Pretzel is selling in hundreds of stores and has partnered with Landmark Theaters thanks to Mark Cuban.

LM: Let’s talk about your business, The Painted Pretzel for a moment. Tell us how your idea came about and what the journey has been like?

RT: Well, it came about by me going to a spa. Clarification, my sister worked at a spa. The owner would make little snacks around holiday time (Thanksgiving, I believe) where she would have little chocolate-covered pretzels and candies but I recall thinking that she could do better than that. I also liked the idea of giving them as Christmas gifts because I was pregnant with my second child and didn’t want to spend any money on gifts. I did it and everyone liked them, like a lot! Because I am a perfectionist -I said to myself that I need a website (probably didn’t need one at the time) but, people started buying them and it started to grow from there. After that, I thought maybe I could sell them in a store so I took the pretzels to a candy convention in Chicago and I received really big orders from all these stores. It was never my plan to have a business.

LM: Talk about the Shark Tank experience and how that came about?

RT: I hadn’t seen the show before. My father-in-law watched it and suggested I watch it and try to get on the show. At first, I didn’t want to do it. I thought, “Why would they pick me? I just make chocolate-covered pretzels. It’s not anything glamorous.” I ended up sending in an email to the show explaining my business. I didn’t hear back for nearly a year. I had completely forgotten about even wanting to be on the show. One day, the casting director for Shark Tank called me to see if I was still interested. They had already made their choices for the season I applied to but they had saved my application. I almost thought it was a joke it was so random.  I still had to send in my video because I hadn’t done that yet (I had only sent an email). My husband filmed me in our home kitchen. It was hilarious! To this day, I think they picked me because they said this girl cannot be serious. It was unedited. My husband filmed it on his way out the door- one take and that was it, we sent it in.

LM: What role does Mark Cuban play in your business and how has it been working with him?

RT: He’s not involved with the day-to-day operations of the business. He gave me money and if ever I need to contact him, I send him an email and he will respond really quickly. He has a million people who work for him (marketing etc.) so whatever you need; it’s readily available.  At this point, most of our things are made at a huge candy factory. They’re not technically my staff but they make it for me.  I have one person who really helps me with the day to day. I’m very hands on and I am a perfectionist so there is still a lot about our business that I like to oversee. Most of the manufacturing details, I hand off elsewhere.

LM: How did the Shark Tank episode affect your business?

RT:  It’s funny because I made the deal in June but, my episode didn’t air until February. No one knew and I couldn’t tell anyone. For that period of time I ran my business as normal. Literally the moment after it aired, my business grew 1500%! I knew right when my segment aired because my sales jumped immediately! Just being on Shark Tank alone, my business grew. From there, it’s just continued to grow. I’ve been in over 6000 stores and before the show I was in all the Neiman Marcus stores. After, I was in TJ Maxx, Marshall’s and then doors opened to where I had to actually decline offers. I’ve been in movie theaters also! Before the show, I was getting turned away from some places. That part is shocking, really.

LM: It sounds like the show really catapulted your business!

RT: Being in front of millions of people changes things. Customers are calling, emailing and ordering. It wasn’t this beautiful, lovely thing. It was actually just chaos! It was wonderful and terrible at the same time because it was just so much to deal with. I think my episode is the most-aired on CNBC. I could not pay for that kind of publicity. People ask me, how do you get on? And I say “I don’t know.” During my season, somewhere around 34,000 people applied.

LM: What do you think makes you different?

RT: I think I’m just not afraid to fail. When I went on Shark Tank, I kept getting asked if I was nervous. The only moment I was nervous was when I walked down that long hallway when they call your name. I just didn’t want to fall! Once I got to my spot, I was fine. I did care if they gave me a deal but not to the point where it would change anything. For me, I’m not living by someone else’s standards. I’ve failed many times in business and I think that’s big. That is resilience.

LM: What’s one piece of advice you can give aspiring female entrepreneurs?

RT: Do not be afraid! If you have a dream birthed in your heart, go do it! You shouldn’t let it die there. Whether you are successful or not (and success should be defined by yourself) you should at least try! If you allow your dream to die, it’s like living a life unfulfilled.

ON HERSELF:

LM: What would you like people to know about you?

RT: I’m just a regular girl who once I got started with my business-- I just couldn’t stop. I’ve attempted to stop before, but I felt like this was the path God had for me and everything I’m about is about Jesus. I live for Him on purpose but everything else is accident.

LM: What are your goals?

RT: At this point I’ve decided I just want to really enjoy life. I want to enjoy the things that are around me: family, business, and life in general. At times, I can get so busy that I don’t have time to enjoy anything else. I still work 65 hours per week in the business but I had to start shutting it down for at least a week around the holidays. It’s good to aspire to do and be more but that shouldn’t be your main focus. I’ve accomplished a lot already so I need to be able to step back and say job well done. My goals are to enjoy what I’ve done, enjoy our kids and not let the business be the center of my attention.

LM: What are you most proud of?

RT: I’m proud that I didn’t lock myself in a box (as of yet). I’ve been willing to go where and how I wanted to go instead of going along with how other people think I should. I think that takes a lot of courage. I started this business eight years ago and it was after my first year that I attended the candy show (in Chicago). When I was there, I heard “Oh, that’s a really cute idea” like I should try something else because my idea was silly. I heard that multiple times. I never let the negative talk change my mind or deter me. I just kept going. The arena league folded around the time I went to Chicago and when that happened my husband didn’t have a job but, we had money saved. This was a crossroad for us where I could either try to make it into retail stores and really make this into a business knowing my husband didn’t have a job or I could go get a job.  I could’ve gotten a job – but that’s not where I was supposed to be.

LM: What are you passionate about?

RT: I’m most passionate about living a life that’s pleasing to God where people can see me and know what I stand for. I’m passionate about my family remaining focused on things of God. No matter what we have, what we’ve been given; being able to stay centered on Him is important. Through the ups and downs, neither has broken me because I stay focused on Him.

Featured WAG Melody Carr-Supermom, Superwoman, Superstar

MCarrFamily

This week's WAG Feature Wednesday is with a woman who I found as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside: Melody Carr.  Melody is the very awesome, Christ-centered, super mom of four and super wife to one handsome QB of a Husband, retired NFL Vet David Carr.  Melody is the mother of three children with juvenile diabetes and a committed champion to helping to provide the healthiest lifestyle possible for her family while shedding light and love into a platform that she may not have prayed for but, God knew she was prepared for.  PS: Don't believe in her superpowers?  Check out her video below! Name: Melody Carr

Player/Team(s): David Carr/Houston Texans (#1 overall pick in 02'), Panthers, Niners and Giants

Kanye or Carrie Underwood? Carrie

Ice Cream or Potato Chips? Chips

Yoga or Spin? Spin

Manicure or Massage? Manicure

Interesting Fact: I am the nurse in my house. 3 out of 4 of my children are diabetic and David was just diagnosed as well so I am a Full-Time nurse. That’s all I’ve got for now!

Where are you originally from and how did you get to where are now?

I am from Bakersfield, CA and was born and raised here, David was too. We ended up back in Bakersfield because both of our families are here so when he retired; we wanted to come back home.

How did you meet your Husband?

We met in high school at a church “winter camp” and we started dating right away (like as in the next weekend when we got back home). Our first date was technically, Valentine's Day. How sweet is that? After high school, David went to Fresno State and I went to a community college nearby. We got married right away and six months later, we got pregnant so before you know it, I was working FT and being a mommy. Financial Aid doesn’t go but so far, you know?...!

Tell me about your day to day?

Having four kids and especially having three diabetic children there is always something randomly happening during my day. Today for instance, I had a Parent Teacher conference with my high school-er. My husband now owns two gyms here in Bakersfield and that is kinda his thing. He trains QBs out here so I am also at the gym a lot. I definitely spend my days “on call.”

What are your fondest WAGS memories?

Oh, my goodness. We were lucky to have been a part of several teams with some really good ladies. The NY Giants ladies were the sweetest! Every time the boys would go away to games, we made an effort to invite everyone to go out to dinner and it was the best experience for me. Anyone was welcome and everyone was welcome (girlfriends, fiancées, wives-all of us.) No one really understands what we are going through no matter how we share it with our family so their friendship during that time was very special to me.

Mel&David

What is the hardest part about being a NFL Wife?

Having kids is really difficult. I was taking them out of schools, finding a new house, finding an area that has good schools, locating new doctors, new sitters and new friends. This doesn’t even include talking about the friendships that you lose (while moving)! I learned about that right away during our first few years in Houston in training camp. I really enjoyed meeting all the new girls and was heartbroken a few weeks later when those same ones were gone. Luckily, the NFL is so small that you switch teams and run into old friends again so even though you are leaving it's always one big family. This was one of the primary reasons why we moved back to Bakersfield because we wanted to be near our family and our roots are here. So during the offseason we don’t have to move the children around as much. It ended up being such a blessing because “this” is home. When we lived other places during season the children treated it almost like a big vacation, which was pretty cool too.

Mel&Gracie

What are you passionate about?

I always wanted to work with kids somehow and my original plan was to be a teacher but God had other plans. We were married young and got pregnant right away so my kids have been my primary focus. David and I are both very active in two youth groups where we live and it’s been the biggest blessing to me. We get to go on trips with the kids and it is such a great experience to be able to minister and just be there for them. Growing up, my youth pastor was my rock and I enjoy being able to be a friend and a mentor to our youth as my Pastor was for me growing up.

What do you admire most about your Husband?

You know, I admire that he’s always the same person. He’s a Godly, Christian man and that doesn’t change or waver so you are either on board with that or not but you know what you are going to get. I’m so thankful that my kids have such a Christian father in their lives. I hear stories from the parents of the kids we are working with in youth group about the impact he is having on their lives. David's brother Darren is the head coach for a local high school in Bakersfield (our hometown) so when Darren became head coach last football season, David jumped at the opportunity to help.  David is the OC and what's great is our oldest son gets to play football for his dad and uncle.  Coaching HS football takes a lot of patience but David is enjoying being able to mentor these young boys!  As for me and the rest of my family, we are loving cheering for my son, David and their team under the big Friday night lights.

Being a Mom, so rewarding but filled with lots of surprises. Tell us about your motherhood journey?

Trying first to raise my now teenage boys correctly and by God’s word is already a struggle enough. With social media there are so many challenges now that we didn’t have to think about so I often ask myself, “do I allow my son to be on snap chat or do I read his texts?” But, each child is different and each accepts discipline differently so having learned that was helpful. Having diabetic children on top of everything else adds a whole new dynamic. Mr. & Mrs. McNair, (the owners of Houston Texans) helped us by funding a research for us (Editors Note: While David was in Houston, the Texans Foundation planned to donate $25,000 a year over the next three years for juvenile diabetes). This was so helpful in helping me to discover our platform. We can’t help but think that we are in this position to help others. We all know social media is one of those places that helps you to connect with people you wouldn’t otherwise meet. There are days where I’m not at all trying to be inspirational about having had to stay up all night with one of our children who was not feeling well but the next day I will get messages from parents whose children are also diabetic.

What word describes how this makes you feel?

Grateful. Grateful is a good word to describe how I feel. One thing I noticed when David was at the Giants after we won the Super Bowl and out of all the people that were talking to us is that while everything was great, it actually wasn’t until David was released that people were vocal about their journey. They had been watching how we handled those (limelight) moments.  These specifically, were the times that I felt most grateful to be in our very unique and special position where we can share our experience and bless people in our own way.

Well, now for something less rigorous; a fun question for you. Show us the answer to “I am the only one in my home who can ___!” Lights, Camera, Action:

[KGVID width="640" height="360" downloadlink="true"]http://wagsredefined.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/MCarr.mov[/KGVID]

Jonesing for the NFL Life

We have all heard the phrase “keeping up with the Joneses,” but for the NFL Family this can be very dangerous. One of the first things I tell my clients is “contrary to popular belief everyone in the NFL is not a millionaire.” Matter of fact, most players are not millionaires and most won’t ever be in that tax bracket solely based on their NFL contracts. From private flights to the infamous red bottom shoe wall, the stereotypical NFL life can be every family’s dream. Honestly, who wouldn’t want to fly private? No pesky security lines or stress of fitting your entire life into 50 pounds or less. But the reality is sometimes flying commercial now prevents you from being broke later. The Athlete

Immediately after players declare for the draft, they are propelled into a life of temptation. From expensive watches or loan advancements for new cars, the stereotypical NFL life seems to be a dream come true. Most players are instantly persuaded by agents, homeboys, family members and even some NFL teammates that they should live like a baller. The irony in this is that most of those influencers who push for the elaborate lifestyle would not be able to live the lifestyle without the generosity of the player.

For the athlete, the pressure to live a lavish lifestyle is very real. They must have the latest Jordan’s and designer brands including the famous Louis belt. Yes clothes, cars and bags are important but the true burden comes from nightlife spending. During the lockout, several players flocked to Miami to train but to also party. We have all heard of “Liv on Sunday,” and Liv was definitely aware of all of the NFL money that was in town. Players spending between $7,000 and $10,000 on a table every weekend was the norm, and complaining about it was simply unacceptable. No one cares about “how their accounts are set up.” If they are in the club, then they are buying tables because once they become a NFL player the expectation of high end living is the new standard.

The Family

The athlete isn’t the only one facing the pressures of living high. NFL wives are judged by their bags, shoes, cars and even eyelashes. Yes even eyelashes! From elaborate weddings and discussions about who has the biggest ring, the standards are high even if your accounts are low. Eyes are watching and unfortunately this is the downfall of a lot of NFL families. Wives aren’t the only ones who fall victim to the extravagant life, family members and homeboys who all of a sudden can no longer take care of themselves and assume the player is now responsible for their existence are some of the biggest culprits in perpetuating the bravado.

The Reality

The truth is some players don’t learn that they can’t keep up with the Joneses until they are already knee deep in debt. Car payments, multiple mortgages, high credit card limits, and countless depreciating assets create unnecessary stress on both the athlete and the family. Someone who is making $500,000 a year can’t live the same lifestyle that someone who is making $10,000,000 a year without some pretty crafty investing. Unfortunately, I have witnessed it all from selling all they had to sending out mass texts to people they barely know asking for $20,000 loans.

The reality: Don’t let the time in the NFL be a waste. Become the Jones don’t try to keep up with them.

For more information on how to start a business or a nonprofit, email me at tpatterson@definitivesportsrepresentation.com.

Tenisha Patterson Brown, Esq.

Forever Fierce, Fabulous & Flawless